Last day of fall classes was today. Stats final. Boo. But over--yay!

I have one more day at GPPA for the semester and then vacation!!!!

So psyched.

This semester flew by. Classes were good, the program's going well, and I can't believe it's already done!

Next semester is supposed to be crazy so I am going to enjoy this break!

Thanksgiving

Had an amazing Thanksgiving break back home. It felt like forever since I'd been home and also like no time at all. I had so much fun getting to go to Shawnee Mission Park and get me a little bit of nature. I also had such a fun time eating out with the family, and Thanksgiving was a blast. Got to see Tony and Ben on Friday too which was fun. David Cook was Friday night and I ran into Renita there, which was awesome! Love me some David Cook. Get to see him tomorrow too!

I loved being back home and getting to see everyone. That will always be home no matter where I end up.

I am still glad I came to school here even though the easier (and financially smarter) move would've been to go to KU or something. I have already learned tons here and am becoming more independent and able to do things on my own. I think it's good to learn how to do things by yourself. It's an adventure.

Can't wait for break in just under 2 weeks! Should be sweet to see Casey and Heather again and get to be home for a few weeks. ;)

Quick update

Took the basic skills test Saturday. I need to pass it to continue with my program next year. I feel good about it but I don't find out my score until next month. Cross your fingers!

I'm having a hard time concentrating on anything because Thanksgiving break is soon and then Christmas is right after that.

I went to go see the Twilight stars last Tuesday and Christina Perri. It was a lot of fun and very cool but I kept wishing so many people could be there with me!

Well, I'm uninspired so this is a short one. More later!

It's been a while

Been super busy lately so it's hard to find time to write.

Had an amazing time last weekend with Jacqueline and Ciara. We went to Gino's East pizza and waited a ridiculously long time for very yummy deep dish pizza. It was just as good as Giordano's if not a tad bit better! The Halloween race was so much fun! It was a blast getting to run in costume. Being Batgirl totally made me like 10,000 times more confident. It's funny what a superhero costume will do for you. That evening we checked out a cozy little bar in Wrigleyville. Fun little place with normal people. There were even board games you could play. It was just so much fun to have people to hang out with who knew me and who I could completely be myself with. I've met some great people here but I'm not close to anyone like I was back home or at Philmont yet so last weekend was so much fun.

This weekend I stood in line in the cold morning for almost 4 hrs to get a ticket to see the Cullens minus Edward (That's Twilight people, Grandpa) on Tuesday. Met some nice people in line. Can't wait!

I am just so lucky

I am so frickin' lucky. I have the most amazing support system ever. I have an amazing family and extended family. I have amazing college friends who I can rely on for anything. And now I have my huge Philmont family. Knowing everyone is behind me makes it so much easier to come here and do all of these new things.

Projects are coming now because it's pretty much full speed ahead until Christmas. I'm super excited for Thanksgiving and Christmas. I can't wait to see everyone again. Plus, in December Casey, Heather, and I will be reunited in Florida!!!! Disney World/Harry Potter land--where dreams come true! We haven't been all together for two years now. Can't wait!!!!

My service learning site--Swift Elementary is going great. The teacher is amazing and I'm taking notes of some of her best strategies. I watched her kids have the quietest indoor recess I have ever seen today and they had fun! It's kind of amazing. I love the word amazing if you couldn't tell.

Last week I saw Sara Bareilles in concert at the Riviera Theater. It was the first time I went to a concert alone and it was fantastic! She is my favorite performer of all time. It was such a great show!

Well that's the haps.

Return of Summer

This weather the past week has been absolutely perfect. Yesterday I took my homework across the street to the park and studied near the lake under some trees. I was way more productive than usual too because I love any excuse to be outside. I also walked to Target for some groceries and later went for a nice jog. I was feeling kind of sick Thursday and Friday but now it's pretty much just a little stuffy nose. I watched the sunset from the rooftop which was stunning. I've missed watching sunsets. Reminds me of Arizona and New Mexico. I really miss hiking.

So our first and second years of school we are in Chicago attending classes and doing practicum I and II at schools. Our third year we have to obtain and internship. I don't know all of the mechanics of it yet but it sounds like you can do it anywhere--Chicago, any other state, even abroad. Some states pay better than others so that's something to consider. At this moment, which is waaaay early in the game to say anything, I would say I'd either want to do it in KC because it's home and super cheap to live, or Colorado, because I think it'd be nice to settle there some day. I'd love Spain too but I don't know if I can be that far away for that long.

Well I'm off to church. Gonna do some homework today and then enjoy the weather! 70 degrees today!

Sigh

Conflicting feelings.
There's something that made me really angry the last week and I can't go into details on here because you can't put things online that someone might find and get you in trouble. Suffice it to say, the powers that be have lied to me and all of us really, can have made life considerable more expensive and difficult. And I'm paying to let them do it. And I can't do or say anything at the risk of appearing unprofessional. Life really sucks sometimes. If you want more details, ask me via facebook or email. I'm ticked off and trying to just get over it because angry just makes life harder.

And off and on I've been getting really sad. When I think about Bonjour or Philmont or just missing family and friends, I get sad. I miss that amazing sense of community and support. My kids at Bonjour were so amazing and I just want to still be there for them. Yes, I know that I probably wouldn't have been with most of them anyway since the school closed, and yes, I know I was never going to be make any money doing what I was doing, but it doesn't mean I can't regret the fact that I can't be with them anymore. And Philmont--you almost shouldn't work at Philmont because of how much you will miss Philmont when you're not there.

I'm okay here. I'm just working to figure out how to remember the past without it causing me sadness.

Wow, I have been horrible at updating this!no

So much has happened since I updated and I have been amazingly busy and it's only going to get worse.

Since I updated last, I started a new job at Garfield Park, got assigned my practicum site at Swift Elementary, commuted for a year and a half to do testing at a high school in Elk Grove, and did a LOT more homework.

Also did some fun things too like go to the Lakeview East art fair, go to a fun bar in Wrigleyville, and go to the awesome amazing Museum of Science and Industry.

Not feeling homesick per se, it's more like I'm reflecting on how different home is from here and not different in a bad way. Knew I'd have to get away to see it more clearly. But life is just faster here and thus more stressful. Comparing it to the SLOW pace of Philmont doesn't help either. Sometimes I just wish everyone here would stop for one second--stop touching their phones, stop racing across the street before the light's even changed, stop slamming doors in people's faces rather than take the time to hold it open for them, stop honking their horns, just STOP. And think about how life is more than just getting to the next place. And I know I struggle with this a lot. I have a lot of trouble not doing something. That's why I miss yoga a lot too. I need to find a place that does it again and get some of my zen back.

Lessons Learned

For this story, let's reverse back to Saturday for a minute.

Saturday I had an amazing run with the running club--one of the members slowed down from his usual pace but kept with me the whole time at a higher speed than I usually run=amazingly hard but rewarding run. So then I went with them all to breakfast at Panera before deciding to go to the Lincoln Park green city market. I found my way to the farmer's market feeling a little proud of myself for making it to yet another new place. The market was really cool with all kinds of organic home-grown products and I got a few things.

So I decide to head back-without checking google maps thinking I'll just reverse what I did. So I hop the bus back the correct direction, get off at the correct stop, and then proceed to head the incorrect direction. Many minutes of walking and two buses, later I arrived home.

Lesson 1: Don't get cocky.

Fast forward to this morning. This morning I got out to the bus a few minutes later than usual so I missed the first 136 I usually take. I saw that the next wasn't for another 10 minutes so I decide to hop on a different numbered bus that goes to downtown. So...yeah, I figure out too late this bus doesn't run express like the other meaning it makes way more stops and then I realize I also don't know how close this bus runs to the school. So I stay on it, panicking slighty at first, and then a bit more. I decide to get off at the Wrigley Building downtown because I'm not sure where the bus goes and I know how to get to school from there. I have 10-11 minutes to make it to class which is more than half a mile away. I jog there all the way backpacking swinging awkwardly. I would have lost the whole backpack but luckily a lady was nice enough to inform me it was open! Thank God or I would've been late. I sprint in the building and catch the elevator and make it to class with one minute to spare, sweat dripping down my face.

Lesson 2: Never try a new route in the morning or when pressed for time.

The past week

I have been pretty busy so haven't written in a while. Heather came to visit last weekend which was so much fun! We went and explored Chinatown which has a bunch of cool shops and restaurants. We shared fried rice and crab rangoon and we each got these super sweet fruit smoothies that we thought were the best things ever but then were way too sweet. ;)

I bought some cool paper lanterns too.

We also went and walked around Millennium Park and did some shopping at some discount stores on State Street. And we had amazing Lucky's before just hanging out with some wine and homemade chocolate dipped cherries and pretzels. YUM.

Walking through Wrigleyville made me realize that I have it pretty good. I don't feel the need to go drink and party every night and hang out with people making crude and sexual comments all night to have a good time. Now I know not everyone there does that every night and has those kind of issues, but let's face it--a lot of them do. And that's just kind of sad.

Anyway, Heather and I had a blast. The rest of y'all need to visit. Now, back to homework, maybe. I'll tell you about the rest of the week later.

How lucky am I?

I like to stop sometimes I reflect back on things that have happened in that past. I know I've written a little about it before on facebook and it gets so frustrating when I can't put it into words, but I keep trying because they're such big feelings.

This past summer I had the absolute best time of my life. It's hard for me to explain it to people who weren't there. Philmont changes you and makes you a better more complete person. The first few days I was there I was very homesick and the wind was keeping me up and it sounded like someone was trying to tear down the tent and I just wanted to leave. And then, suddenly, within a week or so, I never wanted to leave. There's something about simplifying life and getting down to what really matters that just puts your life back on track and into perspective. We don't need all this crap that we think we do. We don't need televisions and designer clothes and ice cubes in our water. We don't need our own personal bathrooms or air conditioning or doors for crying out loud. We don't need beds that are king size and fluffy and all of our movies and knick knacks.

All we need is nature and each other and connection. Connection with one another, connection with strangers who we might only know for a day or a week, and connection with nature and God. I never feel more alive than when I'm hiking, especially when I'm summiting a peak. Knowing that I am doing it. I am making the choice to keep going and not stop even though it's hard until I reach the top.

Philmont made me go further outside of myself than I ever have before too. I had never sang camp songs before or played silly games like we played there. I had never shot a bow and arrow or gun. I had never made home made silly putty or chalk. I had never led a group of hikers by myself. I had never summited a mountain. I did all these things and more and it has made me so much more confident in myself I can't even express it.

I don't think I would feel as comfortable as I do now in Chicago if it hadn't been for Philmont. Philmont made me see that it's okay to be uncomfortable at first--things will get better. Situations that are hard at first may turn out to be the most amazing experiences. Take a chance. Take a risk. The bigger the risk, the bigger the reward.

Now, I don't know if I'll get to return to Philmont any time soon, but I believe I will be back there some day. But no matter what, Philmont changed me forever and I will be forever grateful.

Running Club

Last night I went to the first running club meeting of the Lincoln Park Pacers, the running group I just joined. I took the bus to the meeting area and actually found the place! Score. So I see this group of people come jogging in and start doing warm-ups. So I approach this girl and ask if this is the running club that meets there and she says yes and shows me the running exercises. Then this "coach" guy starts talking to everyone about sprint work and body mechanics and I start thinking...man this is WAY more intense than it sounded like online. Am I in the right place? Meanwhile, a smaller group is gathering nearby. So I ask the girl if this is the Lincoln Park Pacers and she says yes, but this is the more intense form of the group. So I told her bye and thanks and joined the group I meant to join. I had a really great run and found a few people that kept my pace pretty much exactly. It's so much more fun to jog with other people. It keeps you from taking a lot of unnecessary breaks. Then one of the people I was jogging with offered up two free Cubs tickets and I jumped on them because I've really been wanting to go to a game at Wrigley but didn't want to have to pay. Yay.

Today, I had my psychology of the child and adolescent class. The professor seems very cool and interesting. However, my brain hurts. I feel a bit out of the psychology loop at the moment since it's been two years since I did any discussion of theories, and 4 years since I discussed developmental theories. We read this brief article and discussed it and I decided I would need about 3 reads of that sucker before it really made sense. Talk about jargon! Thank God I at least have a psych background buried deep somewhere. The class seems very useful and interesting though.

I just have to get myself back in the swing of academia because the brain is like any other muscle. It has totally atrophied. It's like lifting weights after not lifting weights for two years. Your body says, "What the $^*( did you just do to me?" Owwwww. Such is my brain at the moment.

Brain hurts...

Had the first day of classes yesterday. I had Applied Behavioral Analysis, Professional Development, and Clinical and Diagnostic Skills (can't ever remember the name of the last one). It's definitely going to be a HUGE leap from undergrad. It's hard to know what to expect going in but it just seems like you have a lot more work and since classes are only once a week, they really stress time management because you have a LOT of work to do in a week. Most classes place a heavy emphasis on class participation and there are presentations in every class as well as a chance of pop quizzes. So basically be prepared or else. The last class was nuts. I haven't thought that hard in two years and we haven't even really done anything yet. I think the interviewing class (clinical skills) will be the most challenging because it's just awkward to have to videotape yourself and rewatch it in front of people.

Wish me luck! This stuff is nuts!

Epic run

This morning I walked to church--St. Mary of the Lake http://www.smolchicago.com/

which was super beautiful. Unfortunately I didn't get the feeling I want from a church in that everyone seemed kind of separate instead of a community. I might try spanish mass next week and see if I like it any better. I kind of have to keep going there no matter what though because it's only a 12 minute walk.

I went for a long run this afternoon to Navy Pier. I ran over 5 miles along the Lakeshore path. It's amazingly pretty and you get to see tons of beaches and just lots of active people which is cool to see. You also get a sweet view of the skyline and Navy Pier. Navy Pier was way way too busy--I'm obligated to say that now that I'm no longer a tourist--so I just walked around a little and then decided to find my way back. Rather than run the 5 miles back I decided to walk the mile to the Red line and ride it to Sheridan and then walk the 12 minutes back to my apartment. Note to self--always bring food since I am currently STARVING!

Week one in the windy city

So I'm going to try to find time to keep up on a blog so that everyone who cares will know what's going on here in Chicago. I'm starting a new one different than xanga because it's a whole different chapter in my life. Although I still heart xanga!

I moved in Monday to my apartment in Lakeview. Dad and Daniel drove up with me (we left at 3am!) and helped me move in. That was a trip. I don't know if I should say much more about that. I do appreciate their help though and I consider it a success because no one died, crashed into anything, the truck was returned, and the weather was amazing.

On Tuesday, I thought I had something at the school to attend, but it turns out it was the next day. It turned out good though, because I found out which bus to take and where I should get off the bus and how long it took to get downtown. Luckily we live right next to an express bus that takes you right into town in the morning in under 30 minutes. So since I had nothing else to do Tuesday we finished unpacking and went to lunch at Girodano's. I took Dad on the "L." Ask him if he liked it. ha. Dad and Daniel went home the next morning which was the day I had this thing called institute day at the school. We met some of the professors, talked about professionalism, and got some basic training on some reading testing we will be doing in schools soon. It kind of reminds me of Diebels (sp?) from Bonjour last year. I went exploring across the street that night and discovered we are 3 minutes or so from the Lakeshore running.biking path and under 10 minutes from the lake. It's really pretty sweet. Tons of people out all the time and really pretty. I just joined the Lakeshore Pacers running club which runs Tuesday evenings and Saturday mornings along the lakefront so I'm going to check that out on Tuesday.

Thursday we had orientation at the school and got our ids and heard all kinds of presentations. We got to talk to some teachers at lunch and then the second years tried to scare everyone again by giving is tips for the year. Seriously it was helpful though. I mean it's nice to see proof that they survived and they had nothing but good things to say about the professors.

Friday evening we decided to be adventurous and find our way to Grant Park since they do dancing in the park Thursday-Saturday in the summer. We wanted to grab dinner first and we went to this Greek place right by the red line on Sheridan and it was kind of a bummer because it took over 35 minutes and the food was only so-so. I really need to start that food blog. Took the red line into the loop and found Grant Park. Let's just say it was quite a different crowd from the belly-dancing crowd the week before...Felt a bit out of place during the um..jazzy, R&B type music so we left and checked out Millennium Park at night which was pretty cool. We checked out a pretty cool bar before heading back. And whoa, did heading back prove interesting. We hopped on the brown line because we saw it and knew we could transfer to red from there. So we get on and should have stayed on to Belmont but they announced that you could transfer at State so we got off early. Well, it turns out you can transfer at state but you have to pay. If you wait for Belmont you can transfer free. Technicalities! So we get off and luckily see the 146 express bus that heads straight to our apartment. So we just took that. But once again I didn't have correct change so I had to overpay. Total lameness.

Saturday, I got some stuff done online since we actually had internet. Then in the afternoon we decided to find our way to the Bucktown Arts Festival. We had to take two busses to get there. The neighborhood has a completely different feel than any of the others I'd been to so far. It's very artsy and more ethnic. The festival was pretty cool and had all kinds of art I liked but couldn't afford. I ate some orange chicken from a Chinese place which was kind of a disappointment in relation to the price. (C'mon Chicago, I thought you had good food!) We watched some hip hop dancers too before heading back successfully without getting lost even once!

Today I plan on finding the church nearby and then maybe going for a longer run as well as getting a few things for school done.

Wow I'm tired.

remind me to write tomorrow.